Agony Aunt 1 - The Answering

Dear Hopeless Beautiful Lady with Good Manners,

Not to sugarcoat things, it's plain that this young fellow is completely all wrong for you. He acts interested at first, asking you questions he clearly took no time at all to write correctly. From your well-written letter I can only rightly discern that you are deserving of someone who makes the same effort.

The thing that truly jumps out at me from your letter is that you must find someone with a similar sense of humour. What kind of young man is so debilitated by sarcasm? What kind of young man would desist in his affections of you because of a jested age and life-circumstance?

From what I understand, you're real age would have been in plain view, as well as your marital and familial status. Clearly the boy has no drive or motivation and thus is not even worth the time you took to write me this letter (not that I mind of course).

Find yourself a funny lad, with an acceptable and like-minded sense of humour and try your luck with him.

Good luck dear,
Mags